Saturday, January 6, 2007

WE ALL GONNA DIE!


Cousin Lonnie tole me bout this giant statue of Earth that fell apart at sum college near Atlanta. I aint the type of feller to worry bout them cosmic thangs but this has got me a thinkin.

Sum skupter feller made this giant statue of Earth and it wuz supposed to show folks how fragile the earth is and the whole blame thing fell out apart on the furst day! You reckon somebody is tryin to tell us somethin?

I heered bout global warmin and that doan bother me none cept mess up my firewood sales in the winter. Hurricanes is a gettin worser, but they wuz allways bad. All them foreigners like Al Queda and Harry Kristna shuld be run outa town on a rail but it aint the end of the world. So wut is this omen perdictin?

Ever since they found that statue of Elvis on Mars a wile back, I've been spooked bout the future. Saw a show on TV bout sum feller named Armegeddon who's sposed to be the AnitChrist whos gonna cause volcanoes, earthquakes, and tidal waves, an a giant himmorroid frum outer space crashing into earth sometimes soon. (Probably jus after I pay off my mortgage)

So I didnt need to hear bout this spooky omen jus now!

I hate to tell ya this folks, but I've been thinkin bout it a lot.

WE ALL GONNA DIE!

7 comments:

SwampWoman said...

Well hell yeah it fell apart. That skupter feller wuz frum some heathen furrin place called Finland. Ain't THAT a helluva sissy name fer a country? He prolly don't even know quality construction techneeks like usin' duct tape and JB weld. If he woulda put that sumbitch together with JB weld, it'd still by Gawd be together.

SwampWoman said...

We still got 2 years and 5 months afore the doublewide is paid off here. Me 'n the SwampMan be thinkin' 'bout addin' on one o' them hurricane safe rooms so if it gets a might blowy this year, we gots us a good place to keep the dogs, guns, generator and beer.

BuckNekid and Mabel Wonderful said...

Ye been doin sum deep thinkin, Swamp Woman. That skupter feller wuz a pointy headed intellectal who tried to use biodegrader glue and wen it rained it fell apart. Duct tape an JB Weld wudda fixed it up right straight.

Wudda got back wif ya earlier Swamp Woman cept the puter crashed an I spent a lot of time on the phone a talkin to them geeks on the other end.

Durn computers is like some womens, Cant live wif em and cant live without em.

BuckNekid and Mabel Wonderful said...

Lordy! Yall gots a doublewide!

Yall aim high in life doncha? I gots a single wide but its is a good un. It gots Feng Shoe too.

A safe room is a good ID. Specially if you gots some big loblolly pines near yer trailer. The strongest part of my single wide is beneath the steel floor frame. Wen that weather radio alarms tells me ruff weathr is a commin I jus open a trap door in the floor and me an Mabel sleeps down on a matress on the ground below

It is a lot nicer down there since I skirted the trailer too. Keeps most the critters out. I put the matress on sum pallets and that keeps it out of the rain water flowin by on the ground in a storm.

SwampWoman said...

I had some dealins with them geek fellers my ownself. We had a lil' problem, whut with them speakin' English, and me speakin' cracker, and them not knownin' whut tecknical frases like "well, she uset to go 90 to nuthin' but now she 'bout as fast as a dead possum" ment. The feller sed his name was Steve, too; I talked to him after I talked to Jack. I woulda never knowed that Steve 'n Jack whar reel pop'lar names in India. That do beat all.

SwampWoman said...

I saw sum Chinese fellers on the TV talkin' 'bout that Feng Shoe. They said in the bedroom, you don't want no poison arrers pointin' at you while you wuz sleepin'. I hadn't never give it much thought on account of I ain't never knowed nobody that been poison arrered in the bedroom or no place else, but I reckon havin' poison arrers pointin' at you while you wuz sleepin' would tend to make a body wakeful. If them Feng Shoe folk ever have a cure for havin' 12-gauges pointed at you while you sleep, I reckon my whole neighborhood would be redecorated.

SwampWoman said...

Dang, I ain't never thought 'bout hidin' neath the floor o' the doublewide and puttin' the matress up on pallets. You musta gone through all 12 grades at the school twice to be that smart.

I did see on TV that some dome houses were hurricane and tornader proof. I reckon maybe I'll put me up an ol' tent in the yard, reinforst that sucker wi' some rebar, and start slappin' the concreke to it an' see whut happens. If it dont werk out, the goats will have sumpin' to climb on 'sides the truck.